You Were Made For More with April Sky

by Virginia Elder | Nov 23, 2020 | Health | 0 comments

It’s no secret that motherhood can be exhausting, lonely, and even render you feeling lost. You pour 1000% of your energy, time, and even physical nutrition into this tiny human, doing everything you can to teach, guide, and nurture them into a loving, independent, well-behaved being. At some point, you take a step back (or slide down the wall in tears) wondering who YOU are, questioning what it is that YOU really want out of this life, and feeling more alone and lost than ever.

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Then comes the wave of guilt. You wanted to be a mom, maybe you fought to become a mom for several years, and against all odds, you succeeded, only to find that it’s still not enough. How dare you not be satisfied. You better keep those thoughts to yourself, dry those tears, and pretend like you don’t have aspirations of your own.

That’s what is expected of us, right? That motherhood should be this magical end-all-be-all to happiness, right? And it’s shameful to have your own dreams and to wish to find any level of fulfillment outside of motherhood, right?

Wrong. Keep reading.

Journeys Aligned

April and I connected serendipitously, in a sea of thousands of podcasters and probably the last convention to be held right before the COVID-19 pandemic shut down the world. There was this bright-eyed, energetic mom standing in front of me, babbling on about motherhood and entrepreneurship and how we’re meant to live a life of “and” instead of “or” and I knew she was my people.

We’ve both been through those tough, tough baby days where while you’re full of love and blissful servitude toward your new precious little one, there’s also lots of emptiness and loneliness. She too discovered that she was meant to be an entrepreneur as a way to express her creativity, generate her own income, and allow herself time away so that she could be a better mom.

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Creating Moms Made for More has forced her to grow personally too. April’s had to advocate for herself when she could tell something was wrong, yet several doctors said she was “fine.” I like to think a switch flips when we become mothers – no longer are we simply focused on our own future and doing what we want. Our motivation source becomes this burning determination to make the world a better place for our children.

How I earned my first "internet money" -

Key Practices to Becoming

Before kids, I didn’t have a morning routine, wasn’t focused on financial freedom, and making an impact was nowhere on my radar. Maybe you know that disconnect I’m talking about? Becoming a mother, as wonderful as it is, tests your limits in every way possible – your patience, pain tolerance, perseverance, ability to function no matter how little sleep or food you’ve had, and makes you wonder if you were possibly an octopus in a prior life.

With so many things on your mind, and in an effort to handle them all it’s of utmost importance you implement “pressure-relief valves” in multiple areas of life. This might look like:

Setting and enforcing boundaries in your relationships, with your time, and on your workload.
Radically accepting the things you cannot control.
Consistently practicing self-care so you can recharge and be more present when you’re with your loved ones.
Deciding where your time and energy is most valuable and delegating, eliminating, or automating the rest.
Realizing that many, many things will not be perfect, and they don’t have to be.
Beginning your day alone, centering yourself quietly so you can approach the day with intention.
Identifying which balls you’re juggling are rubber and which are glass so you can let the rubber ones bounce sometimes.

The funny thing is, I didn’t know that as a business owner, the need for these skills would be imperative. April and I have practiced and learned these things and evolved over time, being open to the changes that come with each passing season. The beauty of it all is that we’ve both used the hardships each of us faced in our individual journeys to fuel our ability to help other moms.

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Having an “And” Mentality

I say it every episode, I truly believe you can have it all, and April’s message is firmly that you can be both an amazing, loving mom while also managing a thriving, impactful business. It’s okay to love your baby(ies) while pursuing the next level of education, position, ownership, or success. It is possible to have both, be both, and do both. When you begin to see that instead of a life of “or” where you can choose this OR that – motherhood or business success, food or fitness, money or time – you can craft a life of “and.” You can nurture a positive relationship with your children AND take steps toward impacting society where you see a need. You can have time with your kids AND make money to support them. Our biggest advice to achieve anything you want in life, no matter what that is, is to surround yourself with people who will lift you up, guide you, support your (possibly crazy but you never know if you don’t try) dreams, and to whom you can ask questions or request help without judgment. Having a safe space like that might look like a physical mom-tribe, a mastermind, or an online group.

There are a million Facebook groups out there, so I encourage you to check-in with the ones you like often, and to quietly exit the ones that aren’t positive or helpful or interesting to you at this stage of life. Remember you aren’t obligated to be involved in any particular group, and if you feel you are, it’s time to question the motives, connections, and reasons you might be feeling that way. April has created a group for support throughout motherhood and another group for mom business owners specifically.

Meet April Sky, Mom Business Mentor

Former school teacher turned stay at home mama, photographer, and founder of Moms Made For More, April Sky lives in Bozeman, Montana, where she and her six-year-old are living life on their own terms. She enjoys capturing the realness of motherhood, being out in nature, and working with moms to bring their daydreams to fruition.

She’s focused on leaning into the fear and curiosity around the voices that say “you can’t have your ‘more’ and be a good mom.” Her journey has taught her a bit about being a mom, some a bout health and wellness, a little more about the importance of putting herself first, quite a bit about running a business, and everything about being unapologetically herself in both business and motherhood.