We have worked hard to get debt free and are continuing to work diligently toward an abundant life for ourselves in our retirement years, but even more important to me is the dream for an abundant life for my children.

In this dream for my children, they are not spoiled brats who have been handed everything in life, including a trust fund, from which they spend obnoxiously and are completely unleashed heathens that others only tolerate because of the disposable cash available. That type of picture is shameful to me and makes me angry and sad all at the same time.

A bright future

My dream is a much brighter, carefully curated, healthy life for them, where they are financially free because of the positive influence and valuable guidance we’ve provided throughout their lives.

It’s every parent’s dream to raise a truly successful child, but what does that mean to you?

My intention is for them to grow into well rounded, respectful humans with wholesome souls, common sense, cash management skills, and caring hearts. 

I want them to enjoy a life of true happiness, because they’ve mastered finding peace with what they have, confidence around what they know, and drive to continue to learn and grow to their maximum potential.

I am focused on teaching them about budgeting, investing, and planning for their own future so that they can spend on what is important to their core beliefs and change the world in a positive way.

Walk the walk

They are very young right now, so the lessons we can teach them are light and simple. The largest impact we can make will be by being good examples and actually walking the walk.

You don’t want your kiddos to struggle through a life of debt like you have? Work hard to get your finances straight so that you can model with integrity. Kids are intuitive little buggers and have an innate sixth sense for falsity.

In addition, they have no filter and are unaware of social norms, so they may call me out in a heartbeat if they see that my actions do not match my teachings. This is fabulous motivation and accountability for me, since the last thing in the world I plan to be is a disappointment to my children.  

First up is the project of teaching them to earn and manage their own money. Teaching them frugality is a piece of the puzzle as well. This is a life-long learning curve that some people never quite get.

So if they start early, I hope they will be more experienced, and better at it than the majority of others their age once they reach adulthood.

Establish a System

There is a big debate out there on allowance versus earned income from responsibilities around the house. Our family has settled on a combination of the two.

We disagree with paying them to do things that any respectable human should do, like to pick up after themselves or be helpful or be good at school. But I also need the opportunity to teach them that diligence and good work earns rewards.

It doesn’t matter what plan you choose. It only matters that you’re consistently (long-term commitment), positively reinforcing the benefits and values of the family through helping each other and that you’re using the chores and the money as teachable subjects. 

Expectations

We’ve explained to them that we are a family, thus a team, and that it’s each person’s responsibility to contribute to the household. So, they both have age appropriate tasks that we expect them to complete daily or weekly, with little to no coaxing.

Simple things like putting their dirty clothes in the hamper, disposing of their own trash into the waste bin, taking their empty plate to the sink, or cleaning up their toys are what we consider expected contributions to the household.

One major part of becoming a confident, put together, responsible adult is knowing how to take care of yourself and your living space and keeping it clean. So these are things that we feel are innate responsibilities that do not get rewarded monetarily.

I give the kids a small allowance each weekend, just depending on what I have in my purse. In our household, their allowance is earned by bringing the laundry basket from the kids’ bathroom and helping me put their dirty clothes into the washing machine, gathering the small trash cans from around the house and bringing them to the main bin so that it can all be combined and taken out, or helping to vacuum and sweep the floors (which they are surprisingly good at). These tasks really help us out and make our lives easier.

The hidden gem is how much we get to see the kids absolutely enjoying being helpful and gleam with pride as they do these tasks. We give them credit with a genuine “Thank you for your help!” and a hug. They feel valued, excited to contribute, and even stand a little taller, nearly bursting with pride, when we comment on how clean the house feels when all the weekend cleaning is complete.

More Rewards

On occasion, I have more change and I’ll come up with additional, optional tasks they can “help” me with. I just really want to shower them with generosity but I am aware I need them to think that they earned it, so sometimes that’s a fine line.

They’ve “helped” me switch the laundry from the washer to the dryer, load the dishwasher, put away their clean laundry, feed our pets, take out the recycling or trash to the large bins outside, and put away groceries, to name a few things.  

Seek Teachable Moments

We’ve all heard it a million times – communication is key. But with your children, it really is. All your child ever wants is your full attention, so next time you’re grocery shopping, take advantage of that moment. 

Use your time together for what it is – valuable. Take the time to ask if they can help you compare prices, show them how much the can of spaghettios is, and discuss openly how much the total is at the check out. My kids love getting the receipt after the checkout process!

We play a little game on the way home where they try to spot the most expensive and the cheapest items we purchased. It helps them learn about numbers and involves them in a positive way with our shopping trip.

Each time you head to the store, appreciate the teachable moment and the opportunity you have teach them about nutrition and money.

Curating Excitement around Saving

I always smile at their enthusiasm as they squeal “MONEY!!!” with excitement every time I give them some change. Each kiddo has a piggy bank and they run to deposit the coins. They are each aware that the savings goal at this time is $100.

I make it a point to take them with me to the bank, which gives me the opportunity to talk about depositing checks, getting cash, and intentionally spending and saving money. This has poked at their natural curiosity and created excitement at the thought of opening their own accounts.

Exciting Progress

When the $100 goal is reached, we will go to the bank together, open their very own account, and probably celebrate with an ice cream treat. To sweeten the deal and encourage saving, I’ve informed them that I’ll throw in an additional $100 in their account so that they will have $200 right off the bat.

From there I hope the “fever” will fester and they will want to save more and more and watch the number grow. As they get older and comprehend more, we will continue to expand responsibilities, the potential for income and investing, and discussions on spending, generosity, and saving.

Now and hereafter, I’ll continue to dream about the life I expect for them and come up with ways to manifest that future. I’m excited to continue these conversations in quantity and complexity with my kiddos and share them with you in hopes that my dream can impact other families too.